Lately Lucy has really been getting on my nerves, and then I get further peeved with myself for getting so annoyed with her. It is a vicious cycle of annoyance and today was particularly hard. It seemed like the majority of Lucy's waking hours were spent whining, complaining, or crying. Her loud whines irritate me quickly, especially if she only cries and refuses to "use her words" to explain what she is thinking or feeling. I know that she is old enough to express herself, so I get really irritated when she incessantly wails like a siren and won't respond to my questions or comments. To deal with the noise, I find myself coping by either stuffing my face with sugary treats or raising my voice. Today I ate four Rice Krispie treats in a row while she had a screamy fit on the kitchen floor.
Perhaps today was so hard because I started to do my New Year's resolution, which is to teach Lucy how to have Quiet Time. On a whole, she doesn't like to be independent and do things on her own. She likes to have me help her with everything, and she likes me to be with her ALL. THE. TIME. Ever since she stopped napping last summer, I haven't been able to get much done in the afternoons because she refuses to quietly entertain herself. At her age, Sam would quietly look at picture books in his room for at least 20-30 minutes, but Lucy won't do that. If she and I are the only ones at home, the only time she'll give me space is if she is watching a show on the TV.
But I want her to learn how to entertain herself and I enforced this new Quiet Time period today. She screamed for about 45 minutes that she didn't want to have Quiet Time (see picture above), but she finally, finally settled on playing with Fashion Plates at the kitchen table. Where she sat right next to me. And needed my help every few minutes. Sigh. At least I wrote a few emails and got a couple of bills paid in the interval. But I wouldn't call today's Quiet Time a success.
So my goal this year is to teach Lucy to be more independent. Somehow my presence serves as a crutch for her to not do things on her own, and I want to get rid of that crutch. I want her to learn how to have Quiet Time, how to go to the bathroom without insisting on my presence (she's fully capable on her own), and also to stay in her own bed for the whole night. About 90% of the time, Lucy ends up coming into our bed in the middle of the night and commandeering most of the mattress. I'm going to reclaim by bed space this year!
And, perhaps just as importantly, I want to find better ways to deal with Lucy when she gets on my nerves. Ideally, I won't get annoyed at all. I realize it may take me a while to reach that point, but I want to start by figuring out how to respond to her without raising by voice or having an irritated tone. Maybe I'll start by just pausing and counting to ten in my mind before I respond to her.
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As I am trying to get back to regular blogging again (one of my 2018 goals) I decided to catch up on some of my friend's blogs and came across this post. Yes, yes, yes. I have eaten half a package of hobnobs while Abby whine/cry/tantrums in the next room, so I completely related to your rice krispie treat confession. The tea parties to celebrate staying in one's own bed were a novelty for a week, but wore off and we are back to having an extra guest in our bedroom nearly every night. So we are still working on all the same things you are working on. And I admit, I let Abby watch way too much TV in the afternoon while James is napping. Sigh . . . If you figure out any magic fixes, pass them on to me, and in the meantime know I am right there with you during this stage.
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